According to you what would be the best coping mechanisms for a lost love? Can it actually be attained?
Yes. It can and must be attained!
The best way to cope with tragedy or trauma is to just let it fade away on its own, as much as possible. Feeling angry with the world and being disillusioned is fine. Crying is okay. Feeling vulnerable and helpless is natural. And so it is the same for lost love, I feel.
Different emotions within can be imagined to be different people residing within each of us. Mr. Happiness tries to hold the hands of Mr. Sadness and leads him towards his side. But most of the times Mr. Sadness drags and clubs down Mr. Happiness. It is a tug of war...
Mr. Happiness needs to be stoked, stirred, even coddled, to be the solution he is supposed to be. For the grief one sees in a lifetime, many questions arise and muddles up the mind. And for all questions humans have tried to answer it with the help of frameworks. Mr. Happiness tries to listen to the answers in all these frameworks.
And so some find the answers and solace in the framework of spirituality, some find it in a religion, some in astrology and some in science. Mr. Happiness chooses the framework that suits his/her rationale.
At the same time I believe when tragedy hits, being part of a group of friends and relations can help a lot. As much as freely expressing the pain and the vacuum one feels inside.
And in between the start and end of this stress, something takes place within some of our souls. Something silent, something beautiful, something unexpected. Like the body impregnated with a seed - like the necessity to write, or paint or learn music or the desire to engage with some arts. Or maybe even the wish to find new love.
If the lost love is not irretrievable, then one must attempt to find it back, whether he succeeds or fails. This is what my novel, “Key To My Soul” deals with.
And if the lost love is irretrievable, then one must shake hands with Time and choose a path that will bring back Mr. Happiness to his deserving throne, as soon as possible.
About the Author
Probal Mazumdar works in an IT company. He is an NIT engineer by societal pressure, singer by accident, guitarist by love at first sound, poet by soul, writer by passion, a world class badminton player in childhood dreams, rebel by day, recluse by night, a samosa in a family of laddoos, a Jughead at the dining table, a shameless and congenital dreamer.
Oh! An arsonist too – when his wife is not around, sets his own house on fire with his little son.
He won the FIRST prize in the All India Poetry Competition, 2014, conducted by PSI (Poetry Society of India). Click on www.indianpoetry.org/awardsgeneral14.htm
His other poems have risen too from cold storage into literary journals like Indian Literature (Sahitya Akademi), Wasafiri (U.K. Vol. 67), Acumen (U.K.), OtherPoetry (U.K.), Chandrabhaga Literary Journal (Editor Jayanta Mahapatra), Dhauli Review, amongst others.
He writes short stories too. This is his first foray into writing a novel.
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